I know when I’m not wanted, but I don’t think I’ve ever had as hard of a time accepting it as I am right now. She doesn’t need me to be there for her, and she barely wants me to if at all. It hurts. It isn’t surprising though. I wish I could be there for her. I wish she would want to be around me more. I’m just wishing on a broken star though.

The saying “Life isn’t fair” has really become true for me. I’m the one hurting, yet I don’t feel I’ve done anything to deserve it. All the while, they’re having fun and being happy. I did always say that they would be happier without me. I always said it in a “show me its not true” sense; never wanted to be right.

A part of me just wants to forget her, the other wouldn’t dare think that. I want to move on, but I’m not sure how ready I am to. I’ve tried to tread the water to see, but there seems to be a lack of water. No one seems to want to be around me too much.

There is still so much I don’t understand and I know I should give up trying. I want to give up trying. I need to give up trying. I wish I didn’t have to. It doesn’t make it hurt any less.

I wish I didn’t care about her as much as I do. I’m sure both of them wish the same thing. Probably everyone else too. Too bad I’m stuck wishing on a broken star.